22 September 2014
what do you do when
you find out that the person you were dating for over a year was sleeping with four other women? what do you do when you talk to them and realize that half of them were being told the exact same lies that you were? how do you adjust your reality from what you believed it to be to what it has now become? it makes you feel like you are drowning. or you are in a bad dream that you can't wake up from. how do you deal with the gut wrenching feelings of loss, despair, loneliness, anger, rage, fear, betrayal, and even compassion that are consuming you? how do you get better? how do you walk away? do you? or is a confrontation necessary? people keep saying time. time for what? time until i only think about it once a day? time until the feelings aren't consuming but just a dull ache? yeah, like every break up it will fade. but i will always want answers. why wasn't i enough? what was wrong with me? why couldn't i inspire him to be better? why did he think it was ok to disrespect my love and my body?