29 July 2005

Again, I am speechless

A blind man in Tallahassee, Florida has been having sex with his guide dog. Alan Yoder, 29, has been is charged with a "breach of the peace, by engaging in sexual activity with a guide dog," as Florida laws don't prohibit bestiality. He was found out when he asked a female friend to join him in a threesome with his dog. She prudishly refused, and instead told a friend who called the police.

did you know?

She-ra fights "For the honor of Grayskull" and He-man fights "By the power of Grayskull."

Honor: good name or public esteem : REPUTATION: a showing of usually merited respect
Power: possession of control, authority, or influence over others: physical might: mental or moral efficacy

What else did television teach us?

28 July 2005

I wish I were skiing

Twiggy always wears a life vest when she zooms behind a remote-controlled miniature speedboat.

Glamour and Glitter, Fashion and Fame

I think we should make a live action Jem!! Who is with me?

Pony Swim

Between 150 and 200 wild ponies made the annual swim to the shore of this resort island in dense fog Wednesday morning.
It took the ponies about five minutes to cross the 200-yard channel from Assateague, Md., a barrier island in the Atlantic Ocean, shortly after 8:30 a.m., Shotwell said.
The ponies were then herded through town to a corral on the carnival grounds, where they will be sold at auction Thursday.
Yearlings and younger are sold to thin the herd and raise money for the Chincoteague Volunteer Fire Company, which cares for the ponies.
Ponies that aren't sold, as well as those donated back to the fire department, will swim back to roam again on Assateague, a national wildlife refuge.
The pony swim was made famous by Marguerite Henry's 1947 novel "Misty of Chincoteague."

27 July 2005

the parrot has plenty to say

A foul-mouthed parrot previously owned by a lorry driver has been banished from public areas in a British animal sanctuary after repeatedly embarrassing his keepers, they said.
Barney, a five-year-old Macaw, is now kept indoors at Warwickshire Animal Sanctuary for abusing dignitaries with swearword-littered insults.
"He's told a lady mayor to f*** off and he told a lady vicar: 'And you can f***off as well'," sanctuary worker Stacey Clark said.
Nor did the forces of law and order escape,"Two policemen came to have a look at the centre. He told them: 'And you can f*** off you two wankers'."
Clark said sanctuary workers believed Barney picked up the phrases from television or was taught them by his previous owner, a lorry driver who emigrated to Spain.
"He does say 'Hello, big boy' and 'Thank you' when you give him a biscuit," she added.
"But it's mainly naughty words and always to the wrong people. We're trying to teach him not to swear. Macaws are very intelligent birds."

i have nothing to say

Testimony of an undercover District of Columbia police officer, who "agreed" to murder a woman on contract from her husband but who then saw the husband change his mind:
"He realized he still cares for her. So he said he'd rather have her severely beaten."

It gets political

According to an Associated Press report, Texas House Speaker Tom Craddick told a middle-school class that the U.S. Congress is different from the Texas Legislature, because in Washington there are "454" members on the House side and "60" in the Senate.
The real numbers are 435-231 Republicans, 202 Democrats, 1 Independent, 1 Vacancy- in the House and 100-55 Republicans, 44 Democrats, 1 Independent- in the Senate.

19 July 2005

a bit litigious?

A federal judge rejected a lawsuit filed by a Pennsylvania man who sued God for taking "no corrective action" against his enemies and demands that God compensate him by returning his youth and granting him guitar-playing skills.

In 1971, A Pennsylvania attorney brought a lawsuit against the Devil. It was thrown out of court because the judge ruled that Satan was not a Pennsylvania resident

Baaaad Sheep

Crafty sheep
Hungry sheep on the Yorkshire moors taught themselves to roll 8ft across hoof-proof metal cattle grids - and raid villagers' valley gardens. The crafty animals have also perfected the skill of hurdling 5ft fences and squeezing through 8in gaps.
They have destroyed several gardens and even graze on the village park, bowling green, cricket field and graveyard.
The grids were installed 10 years ago after a gardener in Marsden, near Huddersfield, held stray sheep hostage. (does anyone else find this alarming?)
Dorothy Lindley said: "They lie down on their side, or sometimes their back, and just roll over and over the grids until they are clear. I've seen them doing it. It is quite clever but they are a big nuisance to villagers."
"Sheep are quite intelligent creatures(who knew?) and have more brainpower than people are willing to give them credit for," National Sheep Association spokespeople claim.

Responses to the sheep include:
"They eat plants, flowers and vegetables in gardens.
"It is soul destroying. (Wow, you may need some help)
"When you try to move them on they look at you as if to say it is their patch and you are not right in the head.
( You may not be)
"You can shout at them and even if they see a dog they are not frightened.
"Several drivers have had to swerve to avoid hitting the animals and damaged their cars or been given a terrible shock.
"What we really need is more fencing to stop them. But they would probably find another way out before long.
"They must find more tastier morsels down here."

If women ruled the world

it would be a wifeocracy*

Wifeocracy (noun) wife*oc*ra*cy

1. government by wives
2. community governed by wife or wives

*(or something close. it would only have women rulers but they could be life partners or single too.)

14 July 2005

It's not that I'm lazy

It's that I just don't care. It's a problem of motivation.

I guess I should stop complaining about my job so much. This guy's has to be worse.

13 July 2005

Uhmm? Ok.

Thin Sandar, a chicken seller in Myanmar, had always dreamed of being a man. When she inexplicably(does this happen often in Myanmar?) grew a penis last month, the 21-year-old treated it as an awe-inspiring omen -- as have the thousands of stunned villagers who have traveled to a pagoda to see him.

"On the morning of the full moon day of June 21, I noticed my thing (sex organ) was not the same as before,"(this is a very calm reaction for someone sprouting growths) Thin Sandar, who now goes by the male name Than Sein, told AFP in an interview at his home.
"And my breasts disappeared," Than Sein added. "So I called out and showed it all to my mom and dad."

Medical doctor Aye Sanda Khaing put it in layman's terms in a local journal: "Her penis appeared at the site of her clitoris," the doctor was quoted as saying.
Regardless of the official findings, local villagers and other curious Myanmar nationals are flocking to the Aung Myay Thar Yar pagoda, in this new satellite township 19 kilometers (12 miles) from Yangon, to see Than Sein for themselves and make donations to him or the temple.

"I have never heard of anything like this, so I came to see him," 21-year-old housewife Thandar Win told AFP. "If I was not married, then I too would want to become a man!"

"I was so happy," father Kyaw Htay, 46, said about his son's developments. "I wanted other sons so they could offer themselves as Buddhist monks, but I had only two daughters."

As he waits for the final test results, Than Sein said he firmly believed he had been transformed, and would enter the monkhood for a period of time and seek spiritual contemplation and guidance before deciding whether to marry and raise a family. (interesting, very interesting)

"Whenever I went to the pagoda I prayed to become a man in my next life," he said, referring to the Buddhist concept of rebirth.
"Now I'm happy because my dream won't have to wait until my next life, it's already come true."

You think I made this up. But I did not. Here it is. http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/myanmargenderoffbeat

Ladies and Gentlemen

It could always be worse!!!

The Deep Sea Angler fish lives thousands of feet below the surface of the ocean where there is little food or light. Life is hard and lonely for the young male angler fish as it slowly sinks from the surface where it grew up. At about a thousand meters down, it metamorphs. It gets big teeth, big eyes, and loses its digestive tract. In this state, it has only one chance of survival: having sex. In the distance, he spies a dim light. He is in luck; it is a single "unattached" female! The male, who is only a fraction of her size, grabs hold of her with his teeth. Over time, his skin and blood vessels start to fuse with hers. His skin gets tougher, his eyes start shrinking, and any unnecessary organ wastes away. He is now totally reliant on her and in fact, is part of her. The male has become simply a source of sperm.

The large fish is the female. That small thing that is attached beneath the tail fin? THAT is the male.

Last post about sheep

For awhile at least.

RENT-A-SHEEP SERVICE LAUNCHED IN BERLIN(Ananova) - A businessman in Berlin has launched a rent-a-sheep service for city dwellers to get a taste of the country. Sheep owner Martin Portmann says his animals have already appeared at children's parties. Other customers are hiring the sheep to keep their lawns tidy by eating the grass. Several other clients are hiring the sheep to keep them company while they go for walks. Portmann told the paper, "The price is negotiable. Some people bring a sack of animal feed, some give money but the main thing is they enjoy being with the animals."

Ok, all I am going to say is WHY?

12 July 2005

I am obsessed with the sheep!

Sheep have a strong instinct to follow the leader. When one sheep decides to go somewhere, the rest of the flock usually follows, even if it is not a good decision. For example, if the lead sheep jumps over a cliff, the others are likely to follow. Even from birth, lambs are conditioned to follow the older members of the flock.

Ok, not the brightest animals in the world. But still, who trains their kids to jump off cliffs?

11 July 2005

I don't mean to laugh

But what the heck is going on in the world!!!!???

AP - Fri Jul 8, 9:57 PM ET
Turkish shepherds look at dead sheep in the town of Gevas, near the city of Van, eastern Turkey, Thursday, July 7, 2005. First one sheep jumped to its death. Then stunned Turkish shepherds, who had left the herd to graze while they had breakfast, watched as nearly 1,500 others followed, each leaping off the same cliff, according to the Turkish media reported on Friday July 8, 2005. In the end, 450 dead animals lay on top of one another in a billowy white pile. Those who jumped later were saved as the pile got higher. (AP Photo/Sukru Akyuz/IHA)

Ok, one sheep maybe. Even two I can maybe see. But what in the world are the shepherds doing after, I don't know, 959?


Hope is a state of mind, not of the world. Hope, in this deep and powerful sense, is not the same as joy that things are going well... but rather an ability to work for something because it is good."
~Vaclav Havel

08 July 2005


When I walked from work to my house a few miles away, there was a lot of people - more than usual - on the street. If anything, they seemed resolved to go on. Probably they knew, like me, that below the streets there will still people trapped in tube trains; still people dying down there in the tube trains, buried, still people escaping from tube trains, saved, still people being rescued, dragged from down there in the tube trains, hanging on... And still we walked on, directly above them, resolved to go on; still we phoned our friends, let them know we were safe. Still we headed on our way knowing homes awaited us.
People weren't scared; they knew what was happening and still were doing what they wanted to do. Shocked, no I don't think so, although I'm sure like me when they got home, saw the TV images, absorbed it all, or tried to absorb it all, they were so much more saddened than they might have seemed up on the street.
As for anger - I don't think so. We've been warned about this from officials and politicians, told it was coming, told it was inevitable, that however many they caught, that however many flats full of chemicals and plans they caught, that it was coming... So most Londoners I know thought it was in the post, one day or another. I think resolved to go on with what counts for us, that was the thing we all had in common. But I can't say any of this sure: it's a city of, I don't know, seven million or so? There will be fools and heroes, the strong-minded and the trembling. Maybe we are all little pieces of each. I can't simply judge from those I saw.
So, what is the general mood? When I think about that question in terms of my office, I think of all the mobile phones ringing, all the office phones used for personal calls, all the emails which were non-work-related, all the deadlines suspended, all the in-trays sliding to the corners of desks: what counted was family, friends, lovers, husbands, wives, what counted was making contact, checking life was still life, and so the general mood if anything was one full of love. Love for one another that is always there invisibly, in the background, the shadows, quiet and subtle, but which, in emergency, filled every human contact there was going, that filled that which anyone valued at the time.


this is a tragedy. i can't believe this happened again. was dr. t right, is the world as susceptible as it seems? i only pray that god opens up our minds and hearts.

We are both safe, as is my brother and all those I know. The city is in chaos, sirens everywhere tube and buses shut.

it's been a horrible day, but I'm fine and so are all of my friends.

I am fine. As far as I know everybody I know is fine as well. There was ah huge line in front of the internet cafe yesterday, so sorry I am only writing now. London is still dealing with a huge travel chaos.

I'm fine, I was at home asleep when everything happened.

I'm fine. Thinking of getting a car though. I walked to work, which was very pleasant, and have spent most of the day dealing with terrorist atrocity-related queries from students (how long before the bar re-opens? etc).

I had a bit of a very near miss yesterday, which freaked me out when I saw on the news last night how close a near miss with regards to timings etc. The train Richard and I got on yesterday, at Putney, was a city train and so because we managed to get seats we uncharacteristically decided to sit through to Victoria and change onto the Victoria tube line. Richard left the train at Green Park and I continued up to KX. As I arrived in the station, the alarms were going and we were immediately evacuated from the station being told it was a power failure. By the time I reached ground level, the station was closed. I was in college before 9am and had arrived in the station when it'd just happened. If I had taken the Piccadilly line, I'm not convinced I would have made it to college quite so promptly.

I am ok, Rama is ok but I can't get in touch with one of my friends who works right by one of the stations that was bombed so a bit worried.

Yes I'm fine thanks. Tim is in NY so he's good too. Most interns accounted for but there are police and the army everywhere. It's really frightening - I don't know how I'm going to get home tonight.

Upset, of course, but if this doesn't sound terribly selfish thankful nonetheless that all my friends are ok and one of them in fact works about 30 seconds from one of the buses exploded (about 10 minutes walk from here too) and so ok, really. My nerves are hanging in there... I just feel sadness more than anything I think, right now. I'm walking home in a minute, which'll be strange.

07 July 2005


Why do these things happen? How do people ever deal with the trauma of 9/11, Madrid and London? What was going on that at least 4 bombs were never detected? How did the bombs get there? Why weren't the trains evacuated after the very first explosion? If there wasn't a suicide bomber on that bus, why didn't anyone notice an unattended package? What are we doing? How did the world end up like this? What will I tell my kids about September 11, 2001 or March 11,2004 or July 7, 2005? Are we destined to have more days like this? How do we stop it? Is anything we do going to be giving in to terror? What are the answers?!!


It is important that those engaged in terrorism realise that our determination to defend our values and our way of life is greater than their determination to cause death and destruction to innocent people in a desire to impose extremism on the world. Whatever they do, it is our determination that they will never succeed in destroying what we hold dear in this country and in other civilised nations throughout the world.
~Tony Blair
7 July 2005

06 July 2005

Quotes by Anon

Today I found a marvelous quote.
We are told never to cross a bridge until we come to it, but this world is owned by men who have 'crossed bridges' in their imagination far ahead of the crowd.
Then I was thinking, "wow, what else did 'Anon' write"? So I searched the database. Turns out that 'Anon' has written on just about every subject spanning oh about 2000 years. Must be hard to be Anonymous.
Brilliant, I know.

New Day, New Year

Following the light of the sun, we left the Old World.
~Christopher Columbus

05 July 2005

Jolt of Understanding

"Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not."
~Ralph Waldo Emerson

03 July 2005

Inside every older person...

...is a younger person wondering what the hell happened.
~Cora Harvey Armstrong

01 July 2005


sometimes when i am hunched over my desk with nothing to do, which is often, i think of fun and interesting things i would like to do. when i call rhett or my friends and tell them, "so i have this idea..." they always groan.